Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Director: Jonathan Liebesman
Cast: Megan Fox, Will Arnett, William Fichtner, Alan Ritchson, Noel Fisher, Jeremy Howard, and Johnny Knoxville.
Rated PG-13 for sci-fi action violence.
Okay, people. Here's the thing: I'm a major Turtles fan. My childhood revolved around them. I had the toys, I watched the cartoon, my Christmas presents consisted of the toy van with the pizza shooter on top and the Technodrome, in addition to the backpack and lunch box. The original movie that was released in 1990 was the first time I had been excited out of mind to see a movie. It was everything I had hoped for. Granted, I was a biased 7-year-old, but I still watch the original to this day and find it extremely entertaining. Well, after seeing this newest incarnation of the Turtles, I have even more new found respect for the original film.
The story is nothing horribly new except that April O'Neil's past has a major influence on the Turtles' and Splinter's origin. A mysterious gang known as the Foot Clan has recently started terrorizing the city. They are working under the orders of Master Shredder. All we know of Shredder in this film is that he wants to take over the city. Okay, fine. It's up to the Ninja Turtles to stop the Shredder in his evil plan with the help of April.
You might think that one of the worst parts of this movie is Megan Fox's casting as April, but honestly, she was fine. Her role didn't require much anyways, so it's no wonder a more talented actress was not attracted to the project. Even still, there are many bigger problems than having Megan Fox in this movie. The action is frenetic in all the wrong ways. For most of the movie, I couldn't even make sense of most of the action sequences. The character development is practically non-existent. We get the most characterization from April and that's not saying much. But come on! We're paying to see the Turtles! The original movie really did a great job at showing the intriguing dynamic between these brothers. It was fun and hilarious when the occasion called for it, but it also knew when to slow down and put in some emotion.
I'm not saying that the Ninja Turtles should get the Dark Knight treatment, but we have been spoiled with so many incredible comic adaptations in recent years: Iron Man, The Dark Knight, The Avengers, Captain America: Winter Soldier, X-Men: Days of Future Past, and most recently Guardians of the Galaxy. Audiences expect more. These films work because there is talent in front of and behind the camera. They work because there is sincere thought put into them. Let it be known that Michael Bay only produced this movie; he DID NOT direct it. Sure, the Transformer-like version of Shredder was probably his idea, but at least Bay has a distinct directing style. There is no signature anywhere in this film from director Jonathan Liebesman. It's a complete generic paint-by-numbers action flick.
Despite all of my issues with the movie, it does have its redeeming qualities. For the most part, the Turtles still work at carrying the movie, even if they are completely shortchanged on any real development. Michaelangelo is still hilarious and the favorite, but these characters are stuck in a film that is not worthy of them. It is probably still enjoyable for kids, but more than anything, I hope it will encourage a new generation to watch the original film. You can skip its sequels, but I still argue that the original holds up. It has better Turtles, better characters (including Casey Jones!), a better Shredder, better origin story, and a much better Splinter. In fact, I think I'll watch it now. I gotta get this new one out of my head.
RATING: C-
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